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I will stick to the bad pub guide …

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Barbara Ellen: Nightmare gamblers, poncey drinks and dodgy wifi? At least the old fashioned bakers were honest.

Good Pub Guide has named its bar this year. Congratulations to Rose & Crown in Norfolk, which looks like a fine British Bozer. However, the Good Pub argues that the days of “boozers with dim beer and frozen food” are over, and the industry finds “innovative ways to satisfy new customers.”

Well, there’s a problem there. Not many people like worn boozers with “boring” beer (no bottled stuff called arrogant, annoying things like “old wolfberry”, “whore bath” or “armpit farms”)? Is there really anything wrong with the old-fashioned “hot food” menus, which can only be read by removing fingernails from plastic grease, with the urgency of someone buried alive? After the request, you will return to your seat with great difficulty, and your feet will cling to the multicolored sticky carpets, “which did not show the dirt”, to look at the food you offer – usually a pastry, still in its packaging, sweating from the microwave and tasting closer to sock pastry filled with pus.

Instead of these wonderful old skies, what are the new “innovative ways to satisfy customers”? This may be referring to the decor bar wine idikit drage, dodgy wifi not working, expensive drinks in colored glasses that all taste of alcoholic dandelion and burdock, and all the other customers looks like a nightmare featuring the cast of Entourage?

There is no violation of the Good Bob Guide (I am a cultural and emotional opponent of any publication with the world’s “pub” which occupies a prominent place in the title) but I do, with bars closing at 28 weeks, innovative ways still have some way before proving itself .